10/02/2008
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Bridesmaids with Child

I have now 3 bridesmaids who are pregnant and I hope that I am not being rude. I was thinking of taking them out of the wedding because of their due dates. My wedding day is August 1, 2009. One bridesmaid is due in the middle of March, one in the end of April and one at the end of May. I'm thinking that maybe the one due in March can make it, but only if there is no problem when the dress is returned. It seems like none of them will have enough time lose weight after they give birth and even if they still want to get fitted they may lose weight by the time the wedding comes around and their dresses will be too big. They definitely cannot be fitted before they have their little ones. I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings but I also don't want to be stressed about whether their dresses will come back on time or if they will fit. I definitely don't want to have 3 extra groomsmen. What would you other brides do?
vintagebabe's Green wedding
 |  Albany, NY, USA  |  10/02/2008  | 
get the dresses slightly too big. alterations with a seamstress are so cheap. I would be devasted if i was in someones wedding and I got booted about because of the gift of life, and the bride being worried about my dress not fitting right. This is so easily fixed. Please don't dispose of your friends. How awesome that you have 3 pregnant bridesmaids! You have blessings all around you. Get the dresses a size too large. Have them altered to their size a few weeks before the wedding. All will be fine.
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christina
 |  Silver spring, MD, USA  |  10/02/2008  | 
I wouldn't take them out of your wedding, if they are your friends then you should keep them in. I think two months is long enough to lose the weight if they are motivated. Not to mention, they are your friends and do know how important this day is to you and I think you may hurt their feelings if you "exclude" them because they are expecting. Knowing they have to look good in a dress might be good motivation for them to lose the baby weight too. It will be fine. Friends are friends, it shouldn't matter if they are a toothpick or the size of a house. They will stand by and support you through this process, unless they are lacking in the friends and support department when you need them, you shouldn't take them out. :)
scheri's Chocolate wedding
 |  Edmonton, AB, Canada  |  10/02/2008  | 
I don;t think pregnancy or someones weight should be a factor in deciding if they will be your bridesmaids.  You asked these ladies because of your special relationship.  I would not suggest that you offend them.
charlie813's Chocolate wedding
 |  Huntsville, AL, USA  |  10/02/2008  | 
Why do they have to lose weight?  In most towns, there are plenty of seamstresses that can handle emergencies.  By emergencies, I mean that you need major alterations within a week (been there, done that).  A month is NO BIG DEAL and if your bridesmaids are willing to fit the bill, then problem easily solved.

Besides, think about it.  Would you rather have your friends in dresses that aren't perfectly fitted, or not have your friends standing beside you, with hurt feelings to boot??
amcs76's Green wedding
 |  Whitby, ON, Canada  |  10/02/2008  | 
I think it's kind of mean to tell them that you don't want them in the wedding just because 3 of them are having babies a few months before the big day. It's their responsibility to get alterations after their babies are born....so the stress won't be on you, it will be on them to try to lose the weight and get the dresses fitted. Great suggestion form vintagebabe to order the dresses a bit big. If it were my bridesmaids, I would embrace the fact they are pregnant, obviously I have chosen them for a reason, so to take them out just because they are pregnant would be harsh.
angelic1302's Black wedding
 |  Lafayette, LA, USA  |  10/02/2008  | 
Just be real with them.  Ask them about the situation -will they be able to afford a dress when the baby comes?  -Will they have a baby sitter?  Give them the option to tell you if they could or not.  Things do come up.  Even at the last minute.  So give them a little time to give you an answer then deal with it later.  So what if you'll have three extra groomsmen.   They could walk (two guys and then one girl)  Or the extra guys could be extra ushers.  Don't stress yourself about this.  Things do go wrong even at the last minute but the show has to go on right!!!!?!!!!!  LOL!  Just do your part and it will all fall into place!  Trust me!  LOL!
susiemangolinie's Pink wedding
 |  Whittier, CA, USA  |  10/02/2008  | 
i wouldnt take them out of the wedding. i'm in the same situation one of my bridesmaids is due the month before the wedding. we just got the dress too big. we got lucky though our dress consultant has dealt with it before so she had an idea of what size my bestie would be at the time. i dont know if its true but she said you burn 500 calories every time you breastfeed.
vintagebabe's Green wedding
 |  Albany, NY, USA  |  10/02/2008  | 
by the way...... I wanted to mention.. when I got married to my daughters father, my cousin was a bridemaid. She gave birth 5 days before the wedding. Her dress fit her fine. And we had a gorgeous newborn baby girl at the reception to snuggle with.
futuremrspearce09's Black wedding
 |  Beltsville, MD, USA  |  10/02/2008  | 
We just found out one of my bridesmaids is pregnant and she is due in March and the wedding is in July....I don't see a problem with it...she feels comfortable. I think she'll loose the weight and if not, that's okay with me. I'm having my girl's wear different dresses so I don't really mind if she even waits until closer to the wedding to get hers.

I wouldn't take them out of your wedding.....I would talk to them, if they feel comfortable then it's no problem and you can talk to your bridal shop your getting your dresses from and ask when is the LATEST possible date you could order the dresses to be on time for your august wedding.....if it's after the last ones due date, have her judge what size she'd like to wear, get it slightly bigger and just have it taken in.

I think it will be just fine.
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candy4brandi
 |  Everett, WA, USA  |  10/02/2008  | 
it's your wedding but i think it's rude if you take them out because you don't think they will be back down to there normal weight, i am getting married the same date as you and one of my bridesmaids just had a baby and i am letting her wait untill feb to get fitted. i know that's a little different then your situation but you must have picked these girls because they met something to you. i am sure you can find a way to deal with the dress size issue.
aradeah's  wedding
 |  Reading, Reading, United kingdom  |  12/02/2008  | 
If this were me i would be devestated that our friendship were worth so little that a dress would mean more than a friendship. Have you considered moving the wedding? No. Then do not feel that these lovely life givers should have to feel second class to fabric. If i was in their position i probably would not consider you a real friend and would wander at vanity over life. Yes its your big day, and you gaina lovely partner, you do not have to destroy every important person in your life to have a perfect one day moment. Friends should be for life and they may need your support with babay blues feeling unpretty without you blowing them off as possibly too  fat. This is not friendship. You asked these people as frinds to be part of your wedding you should honour that as a decent human being, A wedding is about love and joy not about the perfect photo from a magazine. Alienante your friends at your own peril. It is easy to make this a very joyous occasion. It is just fabric at the end of the day. And as for being rude. I have heard nothing ruder or more vain. How would you feel in their position?
Spend some extra money on some fabric these people deserve it.
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jaani
 |  Kingston upon hull, Kingston upon hull, city of, United kingdom  |  08/06/2009  | 
Why dont you ask them what they want to do, they might be thinking that they dont want to go ahead with the fuss after having a child and afraid of telling you.
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