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whats up with the Bitchy sales ladys???

Ohhhh, sweetie!!! Don't look at yourself that way!! I too, have gained weight & am trying to lose it! It SUCKS!!!!! Don't get discouraged!! I have a trainer (for 4 yrs now) that has seen me go through so many ups & downs with my weight. Since the beginning of 2009 my food was great... until this weekend. I ate everything in sight! cheetos, garlic bread, lasagna, cookies... you name it, I ate it!! So yesterday at training she said to me "Success is your ability to bounce back." So now my words to you are just that. Keep plugging away. Don't let that bitchy sales lady discourage you! Just find another store in your area that carries the dress & try it on there. OR just go try on the dress & show that lady she's wrong! You will look gorgeous on your wedding day no matter what! I too have dealt with some royal bitches in the bridal industry, but don't let her have the satisfaction of making you feel bad. Hope everything works out! I can't wait to see you in your dream gown!

I'll tell you why. Because the higher end shops employ women who starve themselves to look a certain unnatural way and they are hungry and cranky and bitchy. screw her.

go to davids bridal. I am a size 18. i was treated like a princess there. i didn't even buy a dress.. just a coat and accessories. they were lovely!

I think there is no excuse for her behavior and her comment on size 8, or their dresses only being an 8. How stupid is that? I got an alfred angelo size 18W. The people on the phone were fantastic and they don't even charge extra for plus size.

Awww, please don't get discouraged!  I would call up and talk to the manager and explain to her how rude the lady was.  NO MATTER YOUR SIZE, they should be waiting on you hand and foot. This is their business!  First off...I"m not sure why they only carry size 8 dresses---the average woman is a 12/14 (give or take a size or two).    Especially because wedding dresses seem to run small.  I wanted a red dress--and one bridal shop told me that 70% of their dresses can come in red---well when I got there the sales lady only showed me one and made it apparent that I wasn't really welcome in the shop--she even gave the owner a bit of lip!  Needless to say I didn't go back there and to be quite honest, I found the dress I originally wanted anyway (after they tried to steer me in a diff direction) and the bridal shop I am ordering from is fantastic!  Check out on Maggie's site (mine is the Maggie Sottero Amara Royale) and see where else she sells her dresses near you and hit up another shop--clearly you don't want to be around the likes of her. After you find another shop, talk to the manager of the one that was rude and explain to them how rude the lady was and how you can't reccommend that shop and they lost your business---maybe it will work in your favor and they willg ive you a discount on your dress.  :-)  Keep your chin up and try other bridal shops.

I'm sorry you had to go through that.. I had a VERY similar experiance when I went out dress shopping... Don't let it get you down (i kno easier said then done) everyone is unique and beautiful in their own way... But u know what I did I called the BBB and reported them!! YAY for me... Don't let them get to u if there's a dress that you want try ordering it like 1 size to big and go to a seastress and she or he will make it fit you beautifully... Keep ur head up hun!

i ran into this situation. i recently posted a blog about it. i was in tears myself so i TOTALLY understand how you feel !!

Thats is such a horrible story! No one has the right no make you feel bad about yourself. I am riding the weight rollercoster  as well. I went from super thin...(not on purpose..i was really sick) to a normal size now. I went up 8 sizes since april! Whoooa! i look like a human again. I am 5'7 and weighed 97 pounds...it was soooo gross i cried everyday, and even my friends made fun of me for being sooo thin (nice eh!) I had the same thing happen the first time i went to try on dresses. I was a size zero and the lady told me they do not make dresses that small i would have to get it custom made. She continued to say that wedding dress are made to fit "real women" with curves. I was crushed.

I actually found the two most high-end shops in my area were absolutely the sweetest even though I could barely fit into any of their gowns (I'm a size 14 in regular clothes, which is like a 18 in bridal gowns!)  

The one that I had a huge problem with was the mid-range store.The first time I was in there the girl that was supposed to be helping me was a total bitch about absolutely everything. When I saw her manager a few months later at a bridal store, I told her exactly what had happened & also that when I'd called to enquire about a gown that was sitting on the mannequin at the show, I'd been told that the designer wouldn't be releasing it with this particular collection. I went back a few months later & the girl had been fired & the manager worked with me personally to try and find a dress. there was no such luck, but she was lovely.

I had something similar happen as well. I live in a small city where we have 3 bridal shops. My heart was set on a dress by Alfred Angelo and only one of the stores here in town carries the designer. I was SO happy when I walked into the shop to try on dresses and found "The One" right in front of me. The only problem - the sample in store was a size 4 (and generally, dress sizes run small, so it was probably more like a 0 or 2), and I needed a 16/18. Fortunately I had one of my bridesmaids with me who was a doll and tried the dress on, so I had a general idea as to how it would look on a real person. However, the ladies absolutely refused to order the dress in my size.  I was devastated!

What I suggest to you, if possible, is to do some research and see if other stores in your area carry the designer you want to try on. I ended up travelling 4 hours out of town to find that same dress. The ladies at the out-of-town store were amazing, the dress they had in stock to try on fit me perfectly, AND because I was in a larger city, obviously the stores had more competition and I was able to save $250 on the exact dress.

If there's a way to get around shopping at this store, that's what I would recommend. I'm not one to make a scene either, but you should contact them and ask to speak to a manager and let him/her know how you were treated. Just because you're larger than a size 8, which many women are, you shouldn't be treated any differently than anybody else. I hope you can get this sorted out and find the perfect dress. Good luck!

You guys are the best!!! I was soo upset I havent even vented to FH about this....  I vow to never step foot in to that store again and I will call and speak to the owner (who is only in tues and fri of every week) to tell what happened...  You have given me the feed back is soo needed!!!  (huge smile) THANKS!!!!!!!  PS 3 other shopes here carry this dress!! YAY ME!!

gosh who knew buying a dress had to be this complicated!

i still have a year and five months minus a day to go before the wedding so i have not shopped for a dress yet, but im so scared!  i love eating! thats my problem!  im only 19 and i gained a lot of weight the past couple years but naturally in the lifestyle im getting back used to.. (past couple years, weight has been my LAST priority) im around 135/140 lbs and 5'7, a size 7/9 pants and medium top.  (i have like "almost" b boobs.  not much at all actually!!!)  so that means ill be like a 12 in wedding dresses.  which means i WONT fit an 8!  im scared to go w/ family or friends and not be able to fit the dresses..  especially around smaller friends.  eek.

that's sad.  Whenever i use to try on bikinis and they NEVER fit because the top was always too big i would get discouraged.  and then one day i thought...wait a minute.  this is how i am.  i like how i am.  it's the bikini-makers problem not mine that this top is too big.  they are not taking into account that everyone is different and we all don't fit into one mold.  don't make it your problem/flaw/mistake that the show gowns are not in your size.  it's the shops fault.  
oh and comments like someone is an "unnatural" size just feeds this problem that society has in thinking everyone needs to look the same.  i understand she was trying to make you feel better the poster doesn't know the sales lady's eating habits.  and pulling someone down doesn't raise another person up.  there are naturally thin people as there are naturally large people.  we're all beautiful.  :)

Listen you are not the first bride on here with these issues and it is not you at all it is the asshole sales people. So do not take this to heart I know its hard not to when you are treated like this, but you do not go back there and you let other brides know of this place so they dont either. It is not ok for you to be treated this way. I have lost weight in the past few months and I was eating after my pregnancy and found it hard to shift the weight but honestly it all boiled down to me I had to do it or I would have seriously regretted it. I rem reading quotes from brides who had gotten married asking if they could change anything what it would be and what one bride said always stayed with me, she said I wish I made a bigger effort to lose the weight, I know I could have done it but I just didnt and I have to look at those photos forvever.....

That hit home with me personally and I bust my ass to do it I have done it, still have a lil jelly belly but what can you do. Stick with it, its hard I know because I didnt have anyone to do it with. But do not let anyone treat you like this no matter what size or shape you are. Take your self out of that situation and out of that store....this shit drives me so mad.

Head up honey thats where it belongs x

whoops...i just saw my typo.  i meant "i understand that she (Vintagebabe) was trying to make you feel better but she doesn't know the sales lady's eating habits."
and holy cow!  i just read belabrides comment/experience.  that is exactly what i'm talking about.  "real" women?!  everyone is real.

mikeandmel, just because you didn't agree with my method of cheering someone up doesn't mean you have to call me out on it. My best friend modeled. The same one that was a stripper. she assured me most all of her modeling friends were starving themselves. I believe her.

PS. I was trying to be a smartass to make her laugh. Obviously your sense of humor is dryer than a popcorn fart and you feel the need to attack me because you don't agree with me. This isn't the first time you've done this to me on this site either. If you don't like what I say, don't draw attention to it. Ignore me and leave me alone.

And yes.... there are women out there who purposely starve themselves to look unnatural. People who are naturally thin are not unnatural. People who live on celery and water and run on treadmills sucking on bottles of water so they look like hampsters... have a problem. And they tend to be low on protein.. and cranky. It's a fact. And many of them walk our run ways.

and if you were trying to insinuate that i was saying all thin people are unnatural... read closer to what i said... that's not what i said at all. People who aren't naturally thin.. who force themselves to suffer and starve and overwork themselves to achieve a super thin frame..... are not natural people.

Let me give you an example. I have big boobs. They are natural. Women pay money to have breast implants to make their boobs look like mine. That is not natural. And when someone tells those women their boobs aren't natural, I don't get offended. They didn't say there was anything wrong with my boobs. They simply noticed the person who took extreme measures to be unnatural.

I used to work in a lane bryant. We were trained to respect all body sizes. One of our employees used to work for ambercrombie. now I don't know anything about that company, except for that girl came to us after having been trained there and was told by her supervisor that fat people were lazy gross shameful pigs. And I have noticed in bridal salons a lot of snobby slender shop owners or employees look down on us plus size girls, almost like we don't even deserve a nice pretty dress because we aren't starving ourselves to be unnatural from what we are when we walk in the door!

There is a lot of pressure in the fashion industry as well. I believe former supermodels who tell us the tales of meth and coke and starvation to achieve unnatural thinness.

And I wasn't actually saying I knew that particular woman in that dress shop she encountered who treated her like total crap. I don't know why you felt the need to bring that. I think it's pretty obvious. She was an outright bitch to bakerbride. So I was an outright bitch back about her.

I do not consider myself a "big girl" and I still had to use the dreaded "you are too fat for the sample" panel in the dresses I tried on. My best friend got married last summer and is tiny so she was drowning in the samples. Talk to brides in your area and find out where there  is an experienced salesperson that can help you - I can guarantee the girl that you talked to isn't selling a lot of dresses talking to people like that. Someone with experience will be able to show you what will and won't work on your body, and work with you to find your perfect dress. Don't be discouraged by an incompetent salesperson  - you will find  a dress that you love.

hey VB
sorry if i upset you.  i was just making the point that is people were more accepting of others...no matter how they looked...fat, thin...whatever...then perhaps people wouldn't feel such low self esteem.  they wouldn't feel bad walking into a dress shop nor would they feel the need to starve themselves.  i guess being really thin most of my life (until recently!) i've just heard far too many times "are you anorexic", "you should eat more" etc...when i was just naturally thin.  sorry that i called you out and took this post hostage.  
best wishes...sincerely!
mel
ps...the popcorn fart comment WAS funny.  lol.

mikeandmel,

i appreciate your apology and your email. I apologize as well. it seems perhaps you and both have had our fair share of comments made to us throughout our lives.
I'm glad you liked the popcorn fart comment. Feel free to use it lol.

ohmygoodness!!  if i were you i really would have hurt her!  i commute to bakersfield pretty much everyday since i go to csub and i'm getting married at st. francis on h street so it was only natural for me to go dress shopping in bakersfield too.  i don't know which bridal salon you went to but if i were you, i'd warn other bakersfield brides out there to stay far away!  they don't deserve our hard earned money if they're gonna treat customers that way.  i hope you aren't talking about david's bridal though, because honestly, that's the only place i got amazing service and where i ended up buying my dress.  well, i hope you find the right dress without having to put up with any more bitchy sales ladies!