This is halibride's Green Wedding!

My bridesmaids haven't all met one another, and since one of them lives across the country and probably won't be home until the wedding, I created a survey to help them "meet" each other and learn a bit about everyone. I basically just took one of those email/facebook surveys that people answer about themselves and added a couple wedding-oriented questions. I thought I would pass along this idea because my bridemaids loved it and thought it was very original.

What is your name?
How old are you?
Where do you live?
Who is your significant other?
Any pets?
Do you have siblings? How many?
Do you belong to any organizations outside of work like Girl Guides, etc?
How did you meet the bride and how long have you known her?
What is your occupation right now?
What would your dream job be?
Have you ever been in a wedding before?
Love/Hate dresses and dressing up?
Personal Style?
What colour are your socks right now?
What are you listening to right now?
What was the last thing that you ate?
Do you drive/have a car?
Can you drive a stick shift?
Last person you spoke to on the phone?
What is your favourite sport to watch on tv?
What is your favourite drink?
Have you ever dyed your hair?
Favorite food?
What is the last movie you watched?
Favorite day of the year?
How do you vent anger?
What was your favourite toy as a child?
What is your favourite season?
Cherries or Blueberries?
Living arrangements?
When was the last time you cried?
What is on the floor of your closet?
What did you do last night?
What are you most afraid of?
Plain, cheese, or spicy hamburger?
Favorite dog breed?
Favorite day of the week?
How many states/provinces have you lived in?
Diamonds or pearls?
What is your favourite flower?

I have watched so many episodes of Say Yes to the Dress, Rich Bride, Poor Bride, and a Wedding Story (and some others) that I now feel like wedding dresses are all the same. I know that's not at all true, but I don't want to look like every other bride on my wedding day. Do any of you feel that way? I think getting my dress in ivory or champagne will make a big difference, but I guess that remains to be seen....I will have to see what happens when I start seriously looking for dresses.

The dress in the picture is the one I loved the most, although the model does it no justice. It looked much much better on me (and I'm no trying to be vain, in fact, I'm overweight), and that is one of the things I'm trying to keep in mind for next time I go dress shopping.

We just bought a fantastic camera for our birthdays and Christmas (money's tight haha) so I got some great pictures of my ring!! I can't wait until we have our wedding rings and we can take some snazzy ring pictures. The pictures that focus on the band were attempts to capture the inscription "My l'il girlie".

I think we *really* found our reception venue. I just emailed my contact back to make an appointment so the FH can see it (I already have) and make a deposit. It's just what I wanted!

I have not picked all my bridesmaids yet. I need four, and the two I have asked so far are girls I am really close with but haven't known for more than a few years. I was thinking that I really want someone in my wedding that had been in my life and a good friend over the years. Since I don't have a lot of close friends from childhood or high school, I basically have two choices: Kristin or Claire. Really, I am closer with Kristin, but she recently moved across the country. You'd think it wouldn't be that big of a deal since she would have a year and a half to save money to come home for the wedding, but she has the worst money issues of anyone I have ever met!

Basically, I'm just scared that if I ask her, she will say yes but then somehow run out of money before the wedding and not be able to make it. My FH suggested that I just be really upfront and talk to her about it - tell her that I would really like her to be part of the wedding party, but that if she doesn't think she will be able to afford it, I completely understand and will not put her in a position to have drop out at the last minute.

Also, I stupidly asked my co-worker to be my bridesmaid while I was drinking on my FH's birthday with her and her boyfriend and the rest of the wedding party. I see her a lot more than most of my friends and figured that we are probably closer than some other people, plus we hang out with them as a couple, but I still should have thought it through a little bit more than I did. There are probably people who will feel a bit left out in the cold because I asked Erin instead of them. Now I don't see a graceful way to un-ask her.

So overall, it's a bit of a cluster****!

So I woke up this morning after yet another strange wedding dream with a few good ideas. My first one is to buy a cheap and really simple gown with a good shape and have a dressmaker or beadworker add detail to it afterward. I was thinking it could save money, but it might not.....are any of you ladies trying this or know someone who is/has?

Also I thought about having my wedding dress completely made from scratch. The only thing is, while this works really well for people who have always had an image of their dream dress, I really just want whatever will look great on me and don't have a solid image. Has anyone gone this route?

It would all depend on price for me - if it's not going to be significantly cheaper than buying a similar dress from a bridal salon then it's not really worth all the hassle to me. What do you think?

We were all ready to head off to see the church we wanted to get married in, and thought it would be a good idea to read the wedding ceremony info a little closer. Turns out they have lots of rules about photography, music and the ceremony itself. These rules do no accomodate the clear ideas I had for our special day: a string quartet, photojournalist style photography, and a ceremony that has personality like my Fiance and I.

Have you faced similar rules while trying to plan your church weddings? We're strongly considering a different venue now.

The first one was before we were engaged. I dreamed that I was at the church, and I was told Keegan wasn't there yet. I called him and called him through the afternoon. Time passed, and he missed the wedding. In the evening, he finally answered the phone and told me he was so sick he couldn't get out of bed or walk or talk or anything. I was very upset but I told him I understood. I woke up from that one crying.

The second dream was about a month ago. I dreamed that we were getting married and among the guests was a girl that I was very close to at one time but whom I have drifted apart. I remembered that she wasn't invited and that she must have just showed up on the assumption I wouldn't mind. She was pretending to be very happy for me and I was tolerating her. Then I looked around and noticed that none of our real family and friends were there, and the guests were all acquaintences that didn't mean anything to us and weren't actually invited.

So I have no idea what those mean. The second one especially was strange.

My fiance and I went to see his family in another province about a week ago, and everyone is really happy for us. The problem is, he has a few old and ill relatives who are concerned that they might not live to attend our wedding in 2010.

So, my future mother and father in law have asked that if they lend us $5000 on top of the $4000 they originally wanted to give us for the wedding (the 5 grand to be repaid), would we get married sooner.

I don't really want to get married sooner - I won't finish school until December, which means no full-time job until January, and on top of that we are going to Europe next June. I just don't see where the money would possibly come from, even with a generous loan and gift.

On top of that, I'm 22 and don't want to be so young....we JUST moved in together this weekend, so I would like time to adjust to our new life. I like the idea of having almost two full years to plan (even if the first year is mostly just scoping out ideas)

My question: would you consider getting married much sooner to accomodate older relatives who are worried they might die first? I would love to....I might lose my Nan before then, but also there are so many reasons not to.

Well, because some of the brides on WBC have experienced problems with people finding their blogs and trying to ruin aspects of their weddings, I too will be taking my wedding location, date, name, FI's name, etc. I don't think that anyone would care enough to hassle me, but it's better safe than sorry.....

I wish WBC had better privacy settings, so I could set it to only let other members see my blog.

I love to share the details of my life and my wedding, so I hate having to do this, but such is life.

And how do you plan to do it?

I plan to find a way to honour my great-grandmother's memory. I was lucky to have her in my life until I was 20, and she was near and dear to me. She never had a harsh word for me, she listened to me, was proud of me, and loved me very much. She was my favourite person and I was just starting to know her on a more adult level.

What can I do to honour her? I know plenty of people light candles but I would like to do something different. Also, my grandfather and uncle both died two years before she did. I miss them, so would it be insensitive for me to leave them out? I don't want it to seem like I didn't care as much for them or that I've forgotten. I just don't want a wedding to become a memorial service for three family members. I was closest to Gram out of them all.

I hope to find something unique and something that won't make anyone cry. A happy way to include her.

My whole life, I have HATED my last name. It's been made fun of so much. So, of course, i dreamed that my Prince Charming would come with a lovely last name like Smith, or Jones, or MacDonald. No such luck. My fiance comes with a name that people have made fun of throughout his life almost as much as mine has been mocked. If I chose to hyphenate my last name when we get married, the results would actually be considered obscene. So, I'm just going to take his last name....a small sacrifice to be with the man of my dreams.

First, I'd like to thank you lovely ladies for all your feedback on my blog so far. I love reading what you think and then going to look at your weddings and planning.

I had a bit of a meltdown tonight. I've always been pretty obsessed with financial security, and as those of you who are students or have been recently, there is just no such thing until you graduate. I've taken care of my education myself, paying living expenses by working and school with loans. I'll be done in December and hopefully permanently employed by January, but it's just not soon enough.

I've always had certain goals for myself: hire a financial advisor as soon as I get a career job, invest, go on a grad trip overseas, buy a new car...the list goes on. I've been smart with my money as a student and carry no credit or line of credit debt. I do have a government student loan, but I also inherited about two thirds of the balance, which is in high interest accounts that will make the first few years of payments while I prance around planning my wedding. It's ALMOST like graduating debt free....

However, we are going to Europe in June 2009 (accomodations are a gift, all else we pay for), and we have the wedding in 2010. I know relationships and marriage are all about compromise, and I'm finding I have to compromise a lot of the benchmarks that I once deemed critical. I won't be able to make a lot of investments until after the wedding, there will be no new car for me, I won't have a house by 25.

Today it got overwhelming. I don't want to incur debt for our wedding just because we flitted off to Europe the year before the wedding, but I worked hard for 4.5 years to get my degree and I think a massive accomplishment such as becoming an adult without any help deserves a very large reward like we're getting with this trip. Keegan is the one who convinced me not to give up the trip for the wedding's sake.

What personal goals have you editted to make your relationship and your wedding happen? We're going on a cash budget, giving up our movies and meals out for the most part. I will have to give up our second car if it breaks again. I will have to spend most of the money I would have invested initially on the trip and wedding, and he will have to put most of his savings into the trip and the wedding instead of a house like he planned before he met me. I will definitely not be buying a NEW car. Our wedding will also be very sans-frills.

Or are some of you wearing your good old eyeglasses down the isle? I can't see a thing without my glasses, so I can't just go without. Personally there is no way I'm wearing my glasses down the aisle, even if I have to wear pounds of make-up to cover the naturally dark spots under my eyes. I'm going to start wearing contacts a few months before the wedding so I can get used to them.

I wanted to hire a string quartet to play for our ceremony because I have this wacky fear of church organs. More specifically I wanted Pachelbel's Cannon for the processional, played by a string quartet. I heard that hiring music students can be a cost effective way of doing that, so I contacted the music dept. at a local university, and the department secretary forwarded my message to students. This B. Music grad called (classical guitarist) and long story short, to hire the guitarist's trio with violin and cello costs about $450 for the ceremony. Sooooo...back to the drawing board!

Are you brides-to-be hiring musicians? If so, what instruments and type of music, and how much will it cost you? I realllly want the trio or quartet, and so I think I'll have to wait and see how we do with our budget before I make any final decision.

Well Well Well! We finally sat down and picked a date and made a rough guest list. We started off thinking we'd invite about 100 people, but when we made a rough guest list and realized we weren't comfortable with telling people they can't bring guests, we realized that we'll prepare for 150. Our date is in 2010.

We also looked at churches. We're both Christian, and although I have a church that I went to (on and off) before I moved away from home, I did not want to get married where I grew up, which is the boonies and which is a place I did not enjoy living, and I did not want to get married in a run-of-the-mill old church. We thought about a very historical church across from Town Hall , and we thought about a Cathedral, but the historic church has graves under the floor boards, and the Cathedral is WAYYYY too massive for 150 people. I would get lost in the isle on my way to the altar.

After some research we found the church! I've added two pictures of the interior. I haven't seen it in person yet, but I think it will be perfect.

Our reception venue is one we can get discount for since my FI is in the military. It is a fairly nice place with its own DJ booth and audiovisual equipment, and they have a contracted caterer. The chairs are a concern, if they clash with the brown and green colours, but I'll have to go and see what it looks like in the lighting. Because Keegan is a member, we'll get an awesome deal.

So that is that. Now all I have to do is hope that our chosen church allows clergy from outside the parish, as my junior high best friend's dad was my minister and I've set my heart on him being the officiant. I'm not really a super religious person, but a church wedding is important to me, and I'd love a friend to marry me.

We have an approximate figure for how much my FI's parents will contribute to our wedding, and it will be a HUGE help

My fiance went off to see his parents last weekend, and he had a wonderful time. He said it's been two years since he saw his parents and had their full attention (no other family/sibling/me around). We all really wanted me to be able to go, but with our moving date so close, I knew I wouldn't be able to afford the time off work or my travel costs.

Long story short, his parents are REALLY excited that we're getting married and want to give us some financial assistance. They said they figure about $4000 will be what they can do for us. That's AMAZING, especially considering that we think (hope) our wedding won't add up to much more than about $10 000 (not including my dress). Plus, his mother is going to knit me a wedding shawl of my choice, which I'll be able to tell you more about when I pick out a dress. A knitted shawl might not be everyone's first choice, but I know there are some contemporary designs and that it will become a treasured heirloom.

What did you lovely brides-to-be learn on your first day dress shopping?

I went to a prominent bridal shop in my city to try on some gowns today - my chief concern was whether I would be comfortable in a dress at my weight, which is about 20lbs overweight.

My resounding conclusion? YES! I wasn't at all prepared for how amazing I would feel in a wedding dress. I felt spectacular and found three that I could have bought on the spot if the wedding wasn't so far away. The ones that I liked are uploaded as pictures here, but they are all the model pictures.

Things I Learned Today:

1. A good gown will make someone 20lb overweight look like they lost 30lbs.

2. You will look better in your favourite dresses than the models do - that's why they're your favourites.

3. Ask the consultant to pick out some gowns for you after she has seen what gowns you like and gravitate toward. They are very good at their job and you will likely look excellent in the gown she picks for you.

4. If you take size 12, you can still try on a size 8 gown to see the front.

5. When you find a dress that might be the one, you will think about how your fiance will react when he sees you.

6. You should not feel out of character in your gown - you should feel like the most beautiful version of yourself, but not like someone else.

7. I do not want to look like a princess, I want to look absolutely elegant.

8. Stark white does not look good on most skin tones.

Tomorrow my future sister-in-law and I are hitting up some bridal boutiques for a few trial try-ons. I have 1 year and 11 months until our wedding, so I'm not even close to ready to buy the dress, but tomorrow will help me get an idea what I like, and also if I'm comfortable walking down the isle at my current size.

For the past two years I've been struggling with my weight....it seemed like overnight I blew up from my 135-145 zone to 155-165 zone. I know it's only about 20 lbs but it made a big difference on my 5'7 frame.

I have tried the exercise strategy again and again, and I've lost about 10 lbs at those points. But then, I fall off the wagon and start eating junk food and making excuses to stay home from the gym. And then, of course, the pounds come running back to join the rest of their friends on my stomach, hips and thighs.

About half of the time I'm fairly comfortable with it, because if I dress myself appropriately in well structured clothes, it's hard to tell I'm overweight at all. But, I don't really want to feel bad about myself on my wedding day or when I'm looking at my pictures. At the same time, I don't want to unnecessarily diet and be miserable if I don't have to.

So tomorrow, when I try on dresses, I'll be looking for things like squished up back fat and fat-looking arms. If I don't hate what I see, then I won't be so worried about losing weight before I start dress shopping next year.

Does this make sense to you girls (especially if you're struggling with the battle of the bulge like I am) or am I just being crazy?

Oh...and a small part of me just wants to try on the pretty dresses....hehe.

My fiance and I want to know if there are some general guidelines to making an initial budget. We know there are plenty of tips on how to stay on budget, and so on, but haven't found anything about how to make the initial budget.

Is it based on a percentage of our incomes, or do we need to pull a number out of thin air and work for there? I'm 22 so most of my friends are not yet getting married, but those who have, or who will be getting married, have all chosen destination weddings. Nobody I know can give me pointers on the budget for a traditional wedding, because even my parents eloped and didn't have one.

I came up with an idea for favors and I'm not sure if it would be percieved as cheap or not.

I thought that each guest could recieve a recipe card or a few recipe cards at the reception, printed up with our monogram, names and date on the back and recipes with titles like, "The dish that won over his heart" or "His first meatloaf" or "the first meal she made for him". We could either give out different cards with different recipes so guests could trade for the ones they would be most likely to make, or to give everyone a set of three or four.

Let me know what you think! I thought it was a great idea, but I guess I'm probably a little bias. Keegan liked the idea, too, and its something else we can DIY.

After cruising bridal sites and looking at hundreds of photos, I had not found anything that even remotely said, "This is your dress"....

That is, until I looked at the David's Bridal site and found this dress from Oleg Cassini. It is everything I want in a dress - elegant, but not too simple. I would feel like a beautiful lady in this dress.

The problem? I live in Canada, probably about 500 miles from the nearest David's in Portland, Maine. I would go regardless, but at $1000 American for the dress, there is no money left for travel, fittings, etc if I wanted to buy it.

Do any of you know if there are any bridal stores east of Toronto in Canada that sell or could order in Oleg Cassini? Likewise, does anyone know of a similar dress?

This dress makes my heart thump with joy. I can't imagine settling for something else and not even getting a chance to try this on. I can't stop looking at it. Any suggestions are welcome!

Last time I posted, I neglected to tell the story of our engagement, so I'll do that now while my fiance is sick in bed.

I should give some background first. We first met about five years before we started dating, but didn't ever get to know each other and never kept in touch. We had both been involved in an organization but our paths just never crossed again. On an internet dating site, he saw my picture and profile and thought he recognized me, so he messaged and asked if I was that girl from the organization in 2002. I was indeed, so I messaged him back. We started talking and there was an instant connection. We made a date for later that week.

When we had been together for a month or two, we made a trip to the town where we met and took a walk in a beautiful park. There is a small river and a beautiful waterfall. Along the walk, we found fool's gold and laughed about how amazing it would be to find real gold or a diamond on the ground. No word of a lie, the soon after in the news, we saw that a man had found a diamond either in or near the same area.

*** *** ***

On June 7th, I had a girl's day with my boyfriend's sister. We were going to see the Sex and the City movie, so we had a fabulous day of shopping downtown, cosmopolitans on a patio, and the movie. I happened to find an incredible deal on a black Marilyn Munroe style dress, so I bought it. I bought shoes and a pashmina scarf to accesorize. I mentioned that if I knew the day my boyfriend would propose, I'd wear that dress.

The next morning, June 8th, I was laying in bed but could hear my boyfriend talking on the phone in the bathroom. This was odd and out of character, so I got suspicious....I knew to expect a proposal before September, I just didn't know how or when or what the ring would look like.

He came out of the bathroom and told me we had to take his sister to the same little town mentioned earlier to get some paperwork signed for her nursing co-op job. I became even more suspicious because not many offices are open Sundays, her job is in this city (not the little town), and he asked me to wear the new dress as we had to "dress up". I did not, however, question anything too heavily because I wanted to keep everything as innocent as possible.

Once we got to the little town, we went to the park to take a walk to pass time before Grace's appointment.

We got to the waterfall, and his sister kind of faded into the background. He looked me in the eyes and asked me if I remembered the last time we'd been to the park. He reminded me how we joked about finding a diamond in the park.

He said, "Darling, I've found my diamond in you. I love you. I want you to have your diamond now"

He got down on one knee and asked me to marry him - of course I said yes! His sister was there to take candid pictures of the whole thing. One other couple had seen what was happening and congratulated us.

There could not have been a more appropriate, romantic or wonderful way for my fiance to propose.

I'll post a picture or two of the ring :) He did a fantastic job.

You might notice that my profile doesn't have a whole lot of information about our wedding yet, and that's because we've been engaged for all of two and a half weeks, and the wedding is over two years away. We haven't even finalized the actual wedding date yet.

I will leave the entire story of the proposal to a future post, but suffice it to say I am thrilled. They always say that when you meet the right person, you just "know". I had always doubted that, but it turns out that generations of wisdom don't fail that easily. I did "just know". I "just knew" a week after we started dating. Now we've been together for over a year, and it is official: we're getting married.

Our families couldn't be more thrilled. I had wondered about my family. They love my FI, but I'm 22 and still six months from finishing my undergraduate degree and certificate. My mother and grandmother in particular had always eemphasized the importance of staying focused on school and making decisions that put myself and what is best for me first. I worried that they would disapprove of an engagement at my young age and with school not yet finished. I don't know what changed, exactly, but the family is very accepting and has no reservations about our engagement. If my parents had concerns, we wouldn't have gotten engaged, as my fiance asked for their blessing before he proposed. My grandmother must understand that my focus on academia never once waivered last year, and that I want me degree so bad that a future wedding couldn't change it.

Also, we have a long engagement planned, so I needn't do any wedding planning until I finish school in December. We chose a long engagement for that reason and financial reasons. My fiance has a raise coming in the next year or so, and I am seeking a full time position in human resource management for January, when I will have finished school. I work now, but once I finish school my position automatically terminates.

Of course I have a about a billion things running through my head about the wedding. We setlled on the colours brown and green, with a background of ivory.. The brown will be rich and natural, and the green will be either sage or a more foliage-type hue. It will depend on what I see when I head out to look at fabrics, textures and other things. I want my centrepiece to be a tall plain glass vase with pebbles, water and baboo stocks on a glass plate or bottom with pebbles and tea light candles. I will have to do a mock up or two before I'lll know if that will work. I anticipate it will need some tweaking.

I guess that's about all I can tell you for now. It is going to be a long journey, and six months until I can fully immerse myself in planning. I may not update often at first, but a wedding blog is something I've been thinking about for the past few weeks, so I will be sure to check in.