Bridesmaids - Why must everything be so dramatic? - HOITYTOITYGAUDYBRIDE27's Black Wedding by Color Blog

Girls, I've come to accept that drama simply comes with wedding planning. But why must everything be so damn dramatic?

I've had this best friend since childhood. She and I grew up together. We're almost like sisters. I've been there for her through everything. I was the MOH in her first and second wedding. I was there for her when she had her kid and even threw the surprise baby shower for her! So now, when I need her, she is no where to be found.

Jake and I are only going to have one MOH and one Best Man. We don't want t huge wedding party, so no groomsmen and no bridesmaids. Just the Maid of Honor and the Best Man. The only person I could think of was my best friend from childhood. There is no one else. So I asked her if she would do me the honor of being my MOH. She says to me that she had been holding back her true feelings about my fiance for a long time and that the past two years we have been together she was hoping we would not get engaged. When I asked her why would she say that she said that she doesn't like the fact that he has been married before. She herself has been married twice and divorced twice. So I didn't get why she would say that. She said it's because I have never been married before and she feels like I should marry someone who has never been married before too. What the hell does that have to do with anything?

Then she goes on to say that she doesn't think that he is good enough for me because we have different kinds of careers. I am a large business owner and my FH is a chef for a small business restaurant. She feels like he isn't going to live up to the standards. This is coming from a person who does nothing! She does not have a job, she lives with her mother, and has a child and we are best friends. So I asked her since we are best friends and she doesn't live as I do, does that mean we should not be friends? She starts crying and says she can't talk to me because I hurt her feelings and I'm selfish and inconsiderate.

Did I miss something? I was so confused and hurt by all of this. I suddenly have no best friend, no MOH, and I'm confused about how all of this happened. Everything seemed fine until I asked her to be my MOH and I showed her the picture of my wedding dress. She just started crying and saying all of these cruel things. It was so unbelievably dramatic. I let her say everything she wanted to say, and the moment I make a point and argue what she's saying she gets mad and gives up on our friendship.

I don't understand :(

Oh my girlie im so sorry that is horrible if you ask me I think its none of her buisness if he has been married before she has too so why does it matter and she shouldnt have gotten mad at you when you said something to her because she was saying what she felt why cant you??? I'm so sorry that you are going through this she should be happy for you whether she likes him or not shes supposed to be your best friend and support you trust me I had a best friend she stopped talking to me because of stuff that she thought i said that i didnt say at all and she didnt start talking to be till something tragic happened in my family then she decided to apologize and tryed to support me she was my best friend from high school and i told her everything and trusted her and she back stabbed me quicker than i could think my point is girlie people show their true colors after awhile I understand that shes trying to look out for you but she isnt doing you in justice by saying awful things about the man you love...........I promise if she is as good as a best friend as you thought she was she will come to her senses and realize that she was in the wrong and she shouldnt have said the things she said to you again im so sorry girlie hope I could help

Wow. I am so sorry!!! But you make a VERY valid point about where you both stand career wise, it doesn't change that she is your best friend, so why should it matter where you and your fiance are career wise? I really wonder if there is more to the story. Is she afraid of costs of being the MOH, maybe? What she is doing is just not nice, but she is your best friend. Maybe you two can sit down and talk about it, I just feel like there's more to the story that she isn't telling, because otherwise it just doesn't make sense. Good luck, and I hope you all are able to work it out. But if not, remember, you don't want someone to stand up with you that doesn't support your marriage 100%.

I'm so sorry you are going through this, especially with only one MOH and not having any other bridesmaids by your side.

I agree with Beth, it's just to strange. There may be more to it than that. Maybe she's afraid of losing you as a friend since you both were close for so long.

Try to see if things cool down and when it does you should definitely have a talk with her. Hear her out before responding and clear up whatever misunderstandings you may have. It could be that she just took you the wrong way when you spoke up. That happens all too often. Best wishes to you, Darlene.

Sorry to hear you're also having MOH trouble. All I can say is WOW! I agree also, it must be something else. Maybe she's really upset with herself that BOTH her marriages didn't work out. I thought my bff could see past her problems and just be happy for me, but maybe it's just harder for some people. If you're happy, that's all that matters. I'm sorry your friend isn't there for you like you been there for her. I feel kinda the same way right now. I thought out of all people she would be ok w/ the wedding, but when people want what you want... you know what it's called. So hopefully she can get past all her emotions and be there for you way b/4 your Oct wedding!!!

Thank you wonderful women for your comments. It help put a lot into perspective for me. As of right now, she is still not speaking to me. I'm going to give it some time and try to just concentrate on planning the wedding. There is still so much to do. In the meantime, I'm looking for a new MOH and I have no idea where to even start...she is my only best friend. I have other friends, but not best friends.

Thats what i would do to i would just let her cool off a bit and then try to talk to her

I'm so sorry for your MOH drama. My MOH has had some jealousy issues and it's made me not want her to have the place of honor. I' guessing that your bestie is dealing with some things personally that makes her behave the way she is. Funny how people being truly happy really can make other act wacko! Good luck to you, sweetie! I hope she comes around for you!