01/31/2011
anger
anger
   

Bridesmaids
Need to Vent!!!

Ok, so I am soo pissed right now. I have been planning this wedding since September of last year and all of my girlfriends know. I asked everyone I wanted to be a bridesmaid back in October and they all accepted. So we went and picked out the dresses in November and the deadlines for the dresses to be ordered is April 1st. Everything was rolling along quite well.

Unitl this afternoon!!!! One of my best friend's was suppose to be one of my bridesmaids and I have been talking to her about everything we have been doing. When I sent out an email to everyone about their dress and the sashes I found for them and where to get it, she emails me back and says, Oh, I can't be your bridesmaid anymore because my husband and I just decided to renew our vows and we are goig to do it the weekend after you and I need the money for all of my planning!

First of all, why in the hell are you planning your renewal for the weekend after mine when you have known since September of last year when my wedding was?!?!?!

Second of all, when I told her my numbers would be uneven, she told me to just tell my love to deinvite one of his groomsmen! WTH?!?!?! Are you serious? You can't just tell someone after they have been asked to do that and bought their tux that, Hey I don't need you anymore, thanks anyway!!!!

And thirdly, why are you asking me to be okay with it ??? Am I wrong for feeling like I do? I would love some feedback ladies!
bridesmaids
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more of kwepie117 more Bridesmaids
eastcoastwestcoastbride's Blue wedding
eastcoastwestcoastbride
 |  San francisco, CA, USA  |  01/31/2011  | 
Nope. I agree with you. Its a pretty low move to renew their vows the weekend after your wedding. She already had her special day, and she shouldn't ruin yours over it. My and my FH are keeping it simple, we're only having my sister and her boyfriend (also his friend) stand next to us.

How long has she been married? I just still cant believe she planned her renewal the weekend after your wedding.
fairytalebride's Blue wedding
fairytalebride
 |  Toronto, ON, Canada  |  01/31/2011  | 
nope u not wrong  she has alot of nerve but like i been sayin lately  weddings bring out the ugly in ppl and does it ever. I still cant believe she would tell u like that sounds to me that she been planning to mess with your plans from time  this whole renewing her vows the weekned after yr wedding wtf? sounds like someone feeling a bit like she needs to redo her wedding with all your wedding planning she didnt want to be left out  from all the excitment of planning , im all for renewing your vows shoot im doing it  but  why would she choose that date that says alot about her, not cool I say forget her can you get someone eles? cause truly shes not your friend and chose to do something stupid to ruin your friendship
princesni's Pink wedding
princesni
 |  Saint-cloud, A8, France  |  02/01/2011  | 
oh my gosh so sorry... she shouldnt have done that. hope u find a better friend to help you...
nandd2011's Blue wedding
nandd2011
 |  Kitchener, ON, Canada  |  02/01/2011  | 
wow what is wrong with people, you are completely justified in being mad
glamdivabride's Purple wedding
glamdivabride
 |  Decatur, GA, USA  |  02/01/2011  | 
Is she serious? She is not a friend at all. You have been planning your big day for awhile now and that is so wrong of her.  A real friend would make sure she was a part of your day, and her plans for her vow renewal should not interfere. You are not wrong at all. Bridal Party drama is the worse. You don't need people like her in your wedding or in your life!
's wedding
fabulousbride2011
 |  Washington, DC, USA  |  02/01/2011  | 
I hope everything works out, Could you ask someone to fill in her spot and that is not a friend at all
's wedding
renea0319
 |  Columbus, OH, USA  |  02/01/2011  | 
You are not wrong for feeling like you do? I had to kick one of my bridesmaids out because she was acting like bridesmaid dress shopping was an inconvenience for her.
I hope you can find a replace for her.....sorry :(
kwepie117's Red wedding
kwepie117
 |  Charlotte, NC, USA  |  02/01/2011  | 
Thanks Ladies! I was wondering if I was in the wrong to be soo angry because she was acting like I was being unreasonable. She has been married for 8 years and she kept saying they were going to renew their vows when they hit 10 years, so for her to say they are doing it now, out of the blue and the weekend after is totally baffling to me!

   I was able to find someone else this morning to fill in for the spot and she seems really happy to do so. I am now toying with the idea of de-inviting my friend who bailed out altogether!
's wedding
eastcoastwestcoastbride
 |  San francisco, CA, USA  |  02/01/2011  | 
That is complete bull crap. Its pointless to renew your vows that early! I hope you sort things out, and I hope your day is everything you want it to be. :)
kittyvenglish's Orange wedding
kittyvenglish
 |  Forestburg, AB, Canada  |  02/01/2011  | 
OUCH. I'm in a similar situation too. The wedding (of my future brother in law) just was snuck up on us recently, but isn't so close though. I still get a breather of like 2 months (only luckily cause I picked July. If I picked Sept then I would be SCREWED.) to pay for everything, (Cause my kids are in the wedding party and my FH is the brother so of course he is in the party) So I feel your frustration and anger and you know it prob hurts a little?

Your not wrong. Fairytalebride is right. Sometimes weddings do bring out the ugly in people (boy do I know!!!)

Do you have a back up? And yeah, why would she say drop one of the other groomsmen then? WTF? That's no solution!

I didn't want a lop sided party either!! lol. I could only choose TWO bridesmaids because my dear FH only has two groomsman and has no one else.

I FEEL YOUR PAIN hun. Honest to god. It's so frustrating and upsetting.

But like people have been sayign to me. Forget it, she just didn't care enough. Find another bridesmaid...
furturemrslewis's Black wedding
furturemrslewis
 |  Memphis, TN, USA  |  02/02/2011  | 
I know how you must feel and to plan it so close to yours. I hope you are able to replace her rather quickly. It was also selfish of her to ask that you take someone out of your wedding. Good luck to you.
's wedding
Stacey
 |  Hollywood, FL, USA  |  02/23/2011  | 
Thats BS...she is not a good friend much less a bestie. A best friend would NEVER do that to you. That is very inconsiderate of her. Seems to me she is jealous of your wedding and love so she has to renew her vows to validate her marriage. SMH...thats a shame!
's wedding
s2bmcclain
 |  Charlotte, NC, USA  |  03/10/2011  | 
I am wondering if it is jealousy.  Did she have a fabulous wedding the first time?  I am so sorry to hear that but hey at least you know where you stand with her and definitely don't want anyone like that standing by me on my day.  It will all work out and whatever you do just focus on enjoying your day so that when you renew your vows it will be a quiet family ceremony in 30 years because you did it right the first time...lol!  SN:  I have received info from SL Media I am chattin with him now!!
kwepie117's Red wedding
kwepie117
 |   |  03/10/2011  | 
Thank you soo much ladies! Well.....there is a huge update to thiis post. She called me and you have to read about the update to this original story, lol!

To s2bmcclain, I am so happy to hear you are giving Steven a chance, we love him and the fact that we get to keep the rights to the photos is awesome!
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